Isn’t sex great? It’s a well known observation having sex can make you feel better emotionally, it keeps you healthy, and it’s fun. But what about if you’re having too much sex? As they say south of the border, “demasiado sexo,” or too much sex, can have negative repercussions. Spending too much time in bone town can take you to chafing city, and might even put you on the slow train to chronic back pain county. Alas, too much of a good thing even applies to sex, which might be the best thing. Most of you don’t have to worry about most of the things that happen to your body when you have too much sex, but if you’re hitting the sheets on a daily basis, you should read up on these sexaholic problems to make sure you’re staying healthy.
The biology of sex gets our chemicals grooving in a way that puts us at peak human. Our bodies suddenly decide we should be running marathons, our neurons are stoked to be alive, and who can forget the orgasms? But the physical effects of too much sex can take a violent toll on our bodies; leaving us broken pieces of meat who can’t stop bleeding (nasty! but seriously…). To be fair, there are a couple of good things that come along with having non-stop sex. Continue, brave readers, for a whiff of… that’s the wrong phrase to use here. An penetrating dive into educational trip down Oversexed Lane.
Your Orgasms Turn Against You
Isn’t ejaculating great? Well, it might not be if you’re doing it constantly. According to Jonathan D. Schiff, MD, assistant clinical professor of urology at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City, you’re in for a world of hurt if you can’t cool it with all the sex.
He says: “When people ejaculate eight to ten times over the weekend from Friday to Sunday, it’s going to cause some pain and discomfort when you go to that extreme amount.” Stop busting those nuts, fellas.
UTIs Can Be a Problem
Mary Jane Minkin, MD, clinical professor at the Yale School of Medicine, explains: “The urethra—the tube that goes from outside up into the bladder—is literally right next to the vagina.” So, when you have sex, bacteria from the vagina can very easily be rubbed into the urethra and travel up to the bladder, causing an infection. If you’re having a lot of sex in a little time, you’re more likely to get a UTI than someone who only travels bimonthly to bone town. Some of the easiest ways to avoid getting a UTI are drinking plenty of fluids and going to the bathroom right after you finish intercourse.
You’re Going to Get Raw
If you’re having a lot of sex, say two times a day for a month, you’re going rub your genitals raw unless you use some kind of lubricant. If there’s one problem with the human body, it doesn’t self lubricate (other than the honey pot, that is), and because of that, you can develop skin sores, or possibly even calluses, on your genitalia. If you start to notice tender areas on your genitals, you might just need to take a break from all that sex and invest in some lotion.
The Body Gets Used to All That Sex
Having sex on the reg is great, but if you’re constantly getting down with people, you’re going to become used to the sensations, and sex will lose the excitement it once held. It’s like if your favorite food is pizza and you eat it every day. Or if your favorite sex act is oral, and you eat it every day. If you do that, there’s a chance you’ll lose your taste for pizza. Or beaver. Or at least your nonstop excitement for it. How do you make sure this doesn’t happen to you? Easy: scale back all the pizza sex, and maybe even work out a set schedule for your bang sessions.
Chronic Back Pain Becomes an Issue
This is just sad. As you get older, all of the effort you exert during sex, especially if you’re getting wild (or jiggy) with it, will take a toll on your body. Michael R. Marks, MD, MBA, and spokesman for the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons, says sexual back pain “is probably more common than physicians think and for patients to admit to.”
You shouldn’t be embarrassed to let your MD know how much sex you’re getting up to if you’re worried about naked-thrusting induced back pain.
Intense Orgasms Can Make You Go Blind
Wait, what? You read that right: by having too much sex, you run the risk of losing your eyesight. According to Discover Magazine, a 29-year-old male showed up at the ER one day, having become blind in one eye after having sex. He experienced valsalva manoeuvre during orgasm by holding his breath and pushing on his diaphragm, thereby drastically increasing the blood pressure in his eye. Yikes! No thank you! Remember guys, in the final throes of sex, it’s important to breathe. You’re gonna end up blowing out your eye’s blood vessels.
Penis Fractures Are No Joke
Before you swear off sex forever, keep in mind it takes a lot of work to break your penis, but it can be done. It happened to Dennis Rodman three times! According to Rodman, after he spent the day drinking with his girlfriend, they decided to have sex, but not just any sex, the most athletic sex anyone has ever had. At one point Rodman jumped across the bedroom in an attempt at flying penetration, and broke his penis. What’s the moral of the story? Don’t get so bored with sex that you start trying to jump into someone.
You Might Have a Heart Attack
Even though some cardiovascular researchers believe an increase of sexual activity can make your heart stronger, many doctors are quick to point out that most patients are twice as likely to have a heart attack one hour after sex than after no sex. Which is a bit like saying patients who go out a lot are twice as likely to get hit by a car as those who don’t leave the house. Findings that sex can induce a heart attack should mostly worry those who are overweight or over the age of 50. But still, be safe in the bedroom people.
Nobody Wants a Rosebud
How much anal sex are you having? If your answer is “So much anal sex!” you may want to think about taking a break before your insides fall out of your bottom. Unless that’s what you’re going for. In which case, carry on.
Anal prolapse occurs when your rectum collapses and oozes its way out of the anus. One anal prolapse is bad enough, but if you’re having so much anal you’re busting regular rosebuds (nice little euphemism there), you’ll also have bowel problems and anal leakage. You can work on fixing your prolapsed anus by laying off the anal sex, but the only real way to fix a chronic case of rosebudding is rectal surgery.
Also, just in case you need to read this, someone described rosebudding thus: “It smells like blood. And it tastes like raw flesh. It’s not something you’ve ever been exposed to. But it strikes a chord somewhere deep inside.”
Who knew too much of a good thing could be bad for you? If you’re getting groovy in bed on a daily basis, there’s a good chance your brain is becoming addicted to the serotonin release and you’re well on your way to sex addiction. While that might sound like a glorious luxury most will never know, it’s actually detrimental to your mental health. Sex addiction is a form of OCD. When compounded with depression or bipolar disorder, which can be underlying causes of sex addition, you might feel like you want to kill yourself, especially after you’ve had sex. Researchers disagree about whether or not a person can work sex themselves into an addiction, but it’s not out of the question.
Sex Injuries Are a Normal Thing
As with regular exercise, it’s not uncommon to hurt yourself in the middle of sex and not realize you’re injured. You’ve probably noticed mysterious bruises, scratches, aches, and pains the day after a session of marathon love making. It’s safe to surmise the more you have sex, the more you run the risk of hurting yourself, or whomever it is you’re smanging all day and all night.
Lots of Sex Can Make Your Heart Stronger
The most obvious health benefit that comes with having a bunch of sex is the work out you get from all that pumping, thrusting, and spinning (you spin during sex right?), which helps you have a healthy heart. According to E. Dean Nukta, MD, medical director of interventional cardiology at Fairview Hospital, a Cleveland Clinic Hospital, “When it comes to sex and your heart, the benefits go both ways. If you have a healthy heart, you are more likely to have frequent sex, and a healthy sex life may also decrease your heart attack risk factors.”
What does the vague promise of a “healthy heart” mean? It means lower blood pressure, less stress, and all the delicious blood you could ever want to flow through your veins.
Your Vagina Gets Buff
Who doesn’t want to have the most built genitals in the western hemisphere? Having a ton of sex is basically like sending your vagina to crossfit to get into crazy good shape. When you get down on an extra regular basis, your pelvic muscles get an intense work out that help stave off incontinence, strengthen your pelvic muscles, and can prevent uterine prolapse.
You Might Get a Yeast Infection
Mucho sexo isn’t the only reason women get yeast infections, but increased sexual activity can change the balance of normal bacteria in the vagina, leaving room for yeast to grow. Doctors asked about this kind of thing have said that, while sex isn’t the way most people think about getting a yeast infection, it’s important to keep condoms in the mix (just in case your partner has some bacteria on their junk), and to keep clean after intercourse.
Violent Bleeding Is a Real Possibility
If you’re bleeding after sex don’t freak out, it happens to about nine percent of women at some point in their lives. It might be a case of being raw on the inside from lack of lubrication, or it could be a tear in the vaginal septum, a piece of flesh dividing the vagina in half that about 1 in every 3,000 to 80,000 women are born with. A tear in the vaginal septum causes very heavy bleeding, and if this happens, you need to get yourself to an emergency room as quickly as possible. The best way to know if you’re suffering from this kind of tear is to monitor the rate and volume of the blood flow.